Eight Months.

Today marks eight months without my love.

The days on the calendar continue to pass, but it still feels like just yesterday.

I share this to mark my journey — to one day look back and see how God has never left my side. Even in the quiet moments, I can feel His presence.

Some days are harder than others.

One thing I’ve noticed is that life continues to go on. People don’t ask as much anymore, and my grief is still here… it’s just become quieter.

Spring is here, and this is the time of year Ricky would be getting everything ready. He was a plumber by trade, but a true maintenance man at heart — always fixing, preparing, and taking care of things before they even needed attention.

I treasure the calendar he left behind, filled with his handwritten notes — little reminders of what needs to be done. In a way, it feels like he’s still guiding me, helping me carry on.

And that’s what I have to do… carry on.

I don’t always want to… but I have to.

Things are starting to need attention — breaking, or just needing a little TLC. I found myself praying, asking God for guidance. I told Him… You took my maintenance man, so now I have to rely on You to help me through. 🕊️ He hasn't let me down yet.  I am so grateful for the people He's put in my path to help. 

Our granddaughter, Audrey Dawn, is now four months old. She is an absolute doll — so precious, so full of life. And I swear, I can see you in her eyes.

I try not to be sad, because I know you’ve already met her in Heaven… but I can’t help but long for Fanny and PoPo to experience and enjoy our first granddaughter together.

And somehow, in the middle of both joy and longing, I’m learning this truth:

I can be grateful for all I have…
while still feeling grief for all I’ve lost.

Both can exist at the same time.

And through it all, God is still with me. 🤍